I called the youngest to come sit at the table with us to eat.
Her (in fake whiny voice): Mah-ahm, you're ruining my li-ife.
Me (in fake mommy voice): Don't use that tone with me.
Her: Oh my Gah-ahd. Why do you hate meeee?
Me: You are grounded young lady.
Her: Whaaat? You are so unfa-air.
Me: That's it, I want your cell phone too.
Her: Um. Hmm. I'm running out of things to say.
I guess I'm better at being a bad parent than she is at being a bad teenager.